{from Ellen Stumbo's beautiful blog's writing prompt for this week}
We should have known when, even after
the elementary-high school transition meeting—where Jessie’s grade 6 teacher
promised to bodily harm the resource teacher (God, I loved that grade 6
teacher) if they did not have the accommodations in place when Jessie started
school so that she could continue to learn and grow and blossom into the
creative compassionate Jessie she knew she was—the high school had not one single
accommodation in place when she crossed the threshold with her friends. But should
have known would not have changed our decision to send to Jessie a regular class at
the local high school. We quickly rallied allies, friends, and resources to
support the school and lead them into supporting Jessie so she could continue
to learn and grow alongside her peers. Did it work? Perhaps. In most cases,
when we pushed and moved up the ladder of responsibility, we “won.” Principals
and teachers were dragged from above to do what was right (in all senses of the
word), what was required.
Worth it. Yes. But I do not miss it. I
do not miss being asked to make a choice between having the curriculum adapted and
having an aid. I do not miss a teacher questioning the value of teaching someone
like Jessie about cell structure. I do not miss fighting with a school that
defends mounting a community play with vigourous use of the word r#tard. I do
not miss a point-blank refusal to adapt the curriculum or to follow a written
plan (“But if we write it down we will have to follow it!”). I do not miss
being yelled at for taking notes during meetings. I do not miss hours spent learning
how to write a letter, making sure I take every emotion out of recounting a
challenge and stick clearly to only the facts. I do not miss coming home and (WASP
ice princess that I normally am) throwing a Cuisinart bowl across the room into
the wall and collapsing on the floor with tears and snot and bubbly body fluids
cascading out of every facial orifice in sheer frustration at a system so bent
on not making inclusion, or learning, possible for my daughter.
That part I do not miss. I will confess
though, that I do miss wearing the Mothers from Hell biker jacket that I have
stashed away in my closet. It represents the best part of that journey: coming
together with other hellions to battle for the rights of all children—to be
educated, respected, and beloved.
To see what others don't miss, go to http://www.ellenstumbo.com/i-dont-miss-it/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=i-dont-miss-it
To see what others don't miss, go to http://www.ellenstumbo.com/i-dont-miss-it/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=i-dont-miss-it
11 comments:
Nan, we are only on the beginning stages of this journey, so I am not sure all that will happen in the years to come. But I can see so well why you don;t miss it at all!
Thank you for joining the prompt!
We are hoping that part of it included making changes for the children and students that followed. Enjoy each step, never scuba dive alone! Thanks for reading!
Lovely. In your recount of your experience you have provided education for us new on this journey. Glad I am not alone in my use of bowls! New follower!
I am gearing up to fight this battle as my daughter will enter kindergarten this coming August. I had hoped the way would be more smoothly paved by now, but it looks like we will be trail blazers. I am ready, but wish it didn't have to be this way. I will not miss it either!
Welcome back to blogging, I missed you!
Ck ... just heading over to read your blog. Ah yes, bowls. It is SO good to not be alone. I am thinking/hoping that life is better in the inclusion lane. Sometimes detours are needed for sanity. But its all good! And fun! Especially with friends .. and paint! (and baked goods)
Erin, thanks for welcoming me back! Sometimes you are not sure if anybody notices when you are gone ... Trailblazing can be fun ... I will be following you!
We are just getting geared up for middle school and I'm very interested in your experience! Thanks!
This is very powerful stuff and I'm sorry for the difficulties you had. As I head into the world of school for my twins in the coming months, you are reminding me I will need to find my voice and make it a loud one! Thanks for sharing.
Loud is good! So is kind and thoughtful first! I LOVE old and good and new and improved!
Hi Nan, I found you thru Trial Run.
Wow, great post. I like you but if I was a school teacher I would tremble at the knees if I knew you were coming!
we have had an amzing inclusion journey (still are) My 9yo daughter attends a school in the non public sector in Australia, its a school for Rudolph Steiner education, and we are having an incredible, loving, accepting, flexble, adaptable...what more can I say ...experience. I will blog about it when I start my blog, one day...We now have an adopted son, he also has Ds, and I am so excited for him to start school!! He is 3, he is enrolled already and I am so looking forward to his first day of school. How lucky are we! I will now add your blog to my list of DS family blogs :-)Enjoy your freedom from the past, take rest for the future.
Jenni ... I look forward to bush pirates and LOVE the title! WE had friends with children with Down syndrome going the Steiner and the Montessori route and it was such a positive experience for them!I think that's what we would have done if we could have afforded it!
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