I love my husband. He keeps me sane. I know that on a raw day I just have to email him with some blathering chronicle of the day thus far and this storytelling, or act of confession if you will, is an absolution of sorts that sends me back on my way. The fact that he commiserates just strengthens me to be more calm, more patient, more kind.
Last week, Tuesday to be exact, I wrote a prophetic email that is an apt description of why I have a hard time envisioning working from anywhere except home. Except in my fantasies. Note [square brackets] are my clarifications.
Tues. Mar 12, 2013 at 11:49 am
Oh man . . . I came home. [Dan and I sometimes start the day by going up the street to have a coffee together at our local coffee shop. I find it helps me be more productive and is a good way to mark the beginning of my workday. We find it also makes us feel like grown-ups.] Jess and I agreed that I would meditate while she had a shower and then got to work on her blog and email.
Then, in the middle of meditation she calls from above. She is feeling faint [Jessie has these random fainting spells. Not often, but, well, that’s another blog.] Also, she has not actually had her shower, but has been shaking her shaker. [Okay, that just sounds weird, but it’s what we think is a sensory integration issue and she shakes this thing that is like a large tassle for a curtain. Again, guess I should blog about that.] I walk her through what to do when she feels faint and get her to lie down with her feet up for half an hour or so. She is still pale, but better. She goes in the shower and her phone rings. Then a text. It’s Caitlin [Caitlin is Jessie’s community connector from LiveWorkPlay, the organization that supports Jessie through these transition years]. Waiting for her at Tim Hortons, but now on her way back to the office because she has waited 20 minutes. It was hard not to get angry at that! [Note, Jessie is responsible for her own appointments, as much as possible. She uses Google calendar which is synced to her iPhone. Also note, 4 missed meetings and she could be dropped from the program.] Then Jessie decides that she needs to go to the bank on the way to rehearsal because she wants to take money out because she wants to eat out before rehearsal. I am not even going to try to reason, it is her decision. BUT this, of course, need trumps any trying to finish her work or problem solve what just happened with Caitlin. She does call Caitlin and says she is really really really sorry. But she is so intent on getting out of the house in time to eat before rehearsal that she will not sit down and problem solve or finish what she is supposed to do.
I did tell her that because we were not willing for her totally jeopardize her LWP support, she needed to make a list of what she had to accomplish (including problem solving) before going to the DSA meeting [our local Down Syndrome Association where she is co-chair]. So I did force her to do that. So that was my morning. How was yours?
p.s. I am writing this to you because it may be Thursday’s blog, but by Thursday much more will happened and I will forget this stream of blurred existence. [That was the prophetic part.]
Tues, Mar 12, 2013 at 1:15 pm
Hugs [what he calls me]
AAAAARRGGHH!!!!! I’m going to STRANGLE that kid (if you don’t do it first)! . . . The only silver lining in all of this is that it keeps supplying you with raw material for your blog!
Tues, Mar 12, 2013 at 2:10
RAW is right!